The Voice She Needed

When she was a child, people often asked Northampton Community College (NCC) alum Ayden Lincoln ’23 what happened to her real family. They still do.  

“I understand people may not know how to ask, but the correct term is biological family—because my adoptive family is my real family,” she explains. “I wish the world would ask and not stare. I’m incredibly open to sharing my story because of this, and I don’t fault people for not knowing how to ask or what to say.”  

It’s why Lincoln is such a vocal advocate for adoption. She wants adoptees and adoptive families to know they’re not alone. And, she wants those considering adoption to know that even though the journey to adopt isn’t always easy, it’s worth it.  

Lincoln’s story begins in China on October 28, 2002, the day she was born, placed in a shoebox, and abandoned at a train station weighing only three pounds with her umbilical cord still attached. She spent the first year of her life confined to a crib at an orphanage before her family brought her home to Pennsylvania.  

Lincoln’s early story had a happy ending, but that formative first year still left her—and her family—with challenges. She struggled with ADHD and anxiety, which often led to emotional outbursts as she tried to cope with a school environment that felt overwhelming.  

Teachers, administrators, and sometimes even her parents chalked the outbursts up to “bad behavior,” but Lincoln says it was more than that. Though she has no real memory of her first year spent at the orphanage, it was still a traumatic experience. She also didn’t know any other adopted children or adoptive families, which made her experience feel even more isolating.  

“Families and schools need to learn what works best for each child because the resources and support system will be unique for everyone,” she says. “Growing up, my parents tried their hardest—and I am grateful to them—but traditional discipline doesn’t always work for someone who has faced trauma. Oftentimes, parents and schools don’t know how to respond the right way. I want to be the voice I needed when I was younger.” 

Through the struggles in school, Lincoln found her voice. Her third-grade teacher saw through the behavior and patiently encouraged her student to recognize her own potential.   

But it wasn’t until her junior year in high school that Lincoln experienced a turning point. During a science lab, students had to light a burner using a cigarette lighter. Lincoln was too anxious to carry out the task, but her teacher insisted. Lincoln fled the classroom, sobbing.   

This time, though, she didn’t respond with an outburst or stay silent. Instead, she advocated for herself, explaining why the incident affected her so deeply. She even sat down with the teacher to discuss what happened.  

Less than a month later, her school transitioned to online learning due to the COVID-19 pandemic. Lincoln discovered that she thrives in online learning environments.  

She started taking classes as a dual enrollment student at NCC, and after graduation, continued at the College to earn an associate degree in general studies.  

“I really liked being remote because it allowed me a ton of flexibility,” says Lincoln. “English classes were my favorite because I like to write.” 

This fall, Lincoln will continue her studies through Penn State World Campus to complete a bachelor’s degree in digital media and journalism.  

And she’ll continue to give voice to adoption in any way she can. Lincoln has already written guest posts and appeared on podcasts for various news outlets and adoption websites.  

“Every adoption story is different, and every path toward understanding looks unique,” says Lincoln. “My experience has shaped me into a resilient and determined person and showed me that I can accomplish what I set my mind to.”